My Breakfast with Thay

On March 23, 2006, I had the distinguished pleasure of sharing breakfast with Thich Nhat Hanh and Sister Chan Khong. Brother Phap An, acting abbot of Plum Village Upper Hamlet, was the first to tell me how rare this opportunity was, even though Sister Chan Khong had written,

“Please come, I guarantee that you can see me, but for Thay it depends on his health.

“I cannot guarantee anything about the health of a man of 80 year old who refused many very important meetings (Buddhist Forum about the future of Humanity on 21st century in China then for a dharma talk to 400.000 untouchable Indians). But if you are in Plum Village on March 19 to 24, there is a chance because he will teach on March 23 rd, and you can see him a short moment after that! Enjoy relaxingly your trip to India. For the OI transmission I do not know if the brothers agree to do it for you on Thay’s behalf.

“Look forward to see you.”

So maybe it was just plain luck that he agreed to see me! But, as we say in tennis, “I’d rather be lucky than good!”

These seeds were watered when I was sent to India by the Technical Committee (TC) of the Department of Justice to support the start of a test suite of Microsoft proprietary server protocols in Pune and Hyderabad, India. I had less than two weeks notice about this job-related responsibility. As soon as my travel arrangements were made so that the return was through Paris, I contacted Plum Village and asked to visit during the Spring Retreat. The nice thing about this stop over was that my colleague, David from the TC decided to visit Plum Village with me.

My connection with Thay goes back to around 1985 when he gave a lecture in Berkeley, CA. I was sitting next to him in a church pew prior to his dharma talk. I made a sincere effort to see him every time he was in the Bay Area after that.

On Superbowl Sunday in 1997, I was admitted to the hospital with what turned out to be bladder cancer (see http://www.yellowstream.org for details). On the day of the vernal equinox, I felt a remarkable healing take place during a session of guided imagery. Every year, this day reminds me of the famous Zenrin,

Sitting quietly, doing nothing
Spring comes, and the grass grows all by itself.

During the guided imagery session, I had a tremendous insight which allowed me to transform this Zenrin to reflect my situations:

Lying still, breathing in, breathing out,
Health cells grow all by themselves, and I am free of cancer.

This insight was followed by a practice which I still maintain today. Every time I place my left foot, I think, “healthy”. Whenever I place my right foot, I think, “free” – at least when I am mindful! I also use these words to trigger mindfulness when doing sitting or lying down meditation. During my recovery, lying down was the position I could most successfully meditate in. These mindfulness practices were naturally a result of my understanding and love of Thay and his simple method of teaching the dharma.

Seven months later, I was able to attend one of Thay’s retreats at the University of California, Santa Barbara. It was there that the seeds were planted and I would walk on the beach with Thay, practicing “healthy/free”, holding his hand. I feel that his willingness to allow this to happen was inspirational in my recovery. In addition, I had a conversation with Sister Chan Khong about cancer and my use of mindfulness in dealing with the pain and suffering I was experiencing. Her compassion, mindfulness (attentiveness), and loving kindness helped me cope with the rough road ahead of me.

In February, 2000 I went to India to train software engineers (who later got my job through outsourcing). On my way back, I stopped in Plum Village for a few days. It happened to be during the Tet (Vietnamese New Year) celebration. It is a time when the monks and nuns visit each other to share fruits, candies and other delicacies. On one of the days, I wound up in Sister Chan Khong’s room. She was hosting four Mother Superiors from Vietnam, none of whom spoke English. So I asked through Sister Chan Khong for each of them to give a small dharma talk, which they did – with Sister Chan Khong translating. We all had a marvelous time – chatting, listening, eating and just enjoying each other.

Sister Chan Khong’s room in New Hamlet, February, 5, 2000

The next day, I met Brother Phap An, who had achieved a Ph. D. in Mechanical Engineering from Cal Tech and was doing a post doctoral fellowship at MIT when he decided to become a monk. He had escaped from Vietnam on a boat full of people when he was sixteen. I was very moved by his story, and we became good friends.

During the period after my visit to Plum Village in 2000 until my visit in 2006, I was a founding member of the Mountain Sangha (see http://www.mountainsangha.org for more information) and participated in Lyn Fine’s aspirant group. I also had no recurrence of cancer and wanted to teach a class on Mindfulness in Healing as part of my aspiration to be ordained in the Order of Interbeing (Thay’s international organization of engaged Buddhism).

When the possibility of visiting Plum Village came up in March, 2006, I wrote to Plum Village to see if I could participate in the Spring Retreat. It took several phone calls and an email to Sister Chan Khong to finally get the answer I was hoping for. Fortunately, the day after I arrived from India was a ‘day of mindfulness’, which gave me an opportunity to explore the beautiful wine country around Plum Village and recover from jet lag. The next day (Tuesday – the first day of spring), Brother Phap Yu taught a class on the eighteen elements of being, and I was very impressed with his presentation.

I began looking for Brother Phap An at every meal during the first few days, but he was no where to be seen. When I asked where he was, I was told that he had spent many late nights working on the computer networks in Lower and New Hamlets. I didn’t think I would be able to see him at all this trip. Every email I sent bounced, and I later found out that he didn’t read his Plum Village email because of spam. However, there was another class on Wednesday and Phap An was the teacher! I was thrilled when he looked at me in recognition, and I could hardly wait to jump up and hug him, which I did after the class was over. We planned to meet after lunch and catch up on things. I told him how impressed I was with his and Phap Yu’s teachings and said that “the dharma was in good hands”, with teachers like them around and Phap Yu.

We began to speak about the reasons for my visit and I introduced him to my traveling companion, David. Next, he told me about the problems he was having with the networks and showed me a diagram of what he had done. To make things easier, I suggested that we go over to Lower Hamlet and help him solve the networking problems, which we did. Of course, this was an easy matter for David and I, since we are the so-called, “protocol experts”. We taught Phap An some of the tricks of the trade and within ten minutes got the network up and running to Phap An’s total delight. David and I were quite honored and pleased to make a significant contribution to the sangha during our short stay at Plum Village.

Jerome and Brother Phap An on the porch of Thay’s hermitage in Upper Hamlet, March 22, 2006

The next day (Thursday) was a day of mindfulness with Thich Nhat Hanh. His talk was in Vietnamese, with Sister Chan Khong translating to English. After the dharma talk, I approached Sister Chan Khong and reminded her of who I was. She asked me to get my shoes and follow her to get my breakfast. Then she took me to Thay’s room! She told me not to eat until Thay came down for breakfast. I was literally beside myself, so I merely drank my cup of tea until he came down. Sister Chan Khong asked my how I would work with someone who had metastatic cancer, and as I fumbled with my answer, Thay came down the stairs.

I jumped up to hug him and sat down when he did. His first words were for me to share his sticky buns with him and the two attendant nuns by my side. He mentioned that one of the sisters was in jurisprudence, so I began a chat with her. I then told Thay that I thought the dharma was in good hands with the likes of Brothers Phap Yu and Phap An teaching as well as they did. He said to me, “I think you are doing very well yourself!” – and this from the Zen master himself. A little while later, I reviewed my practices with Thay and began to answer Sister Chan Khong’s question about cancer, starting with the famous Zenrin mentioned above. I spoke about the transformation I had had during the guided imagery session and recited my transformation of the famous Zenrin. I said that my purpose in teaching the class on Mindfulness in Healing was to inspire people to take charge of their own healing and use mindfulness practice to tune into their bodies to allow “healthy cells grow all by themselves.” I said that I would recommend guided imagery, acupuncture, Chinese herbs and supplements, deep relaxation, Feldenkrais, movement, and other adjunct methods to further their healing experience. The conversation drifted away for a while and Sister Chan Khong later said with a delightful smile, “I love the idea of ‘healthy cells grow all by themselves’”.

Most of the time, I noticed Thay sitting quite calmly in a posture of complete equanimity. He was really enjoying his breakfast. The food he was served look scrumptious – all the delights one would find at a typical Dim Sum meal, but totally vegetarian! At other times, other subjects were discussed, but when Thay finished his breakfast, he began to get tired and needed to rest before walking meditation. I left feeling the joy of being with such remarkable beings. And guess what happened? Brother Phap An was across the hall and invited me into the New Hamlet office to tell me that the configuration of the network was successful. He did, however, have a problem, which we could solve after walking meditation.

Thay is a man of peace and he inspires me every day. His loving kindness, compassion, sympathetic joy, equanimity, and generosity have penetrated my being as it has the monks and nuns of Plum Village. I encourage anyone who has not read or listened to him speak to do so as soon as possible.

 More Information

For more information about my illness and recovery, I invite you to call or write to me. You can also visit my web site, http://www.yellowstream.org.

Photo Gallery

Mindfulness Bell, Upper Hamlet, March 19, 2006

Some of the thousands of daffodils in Upper Hamlet, March 21, 2006

Mindfulness Bell, Upper Hamlet, March 19, 2006

Buddha outside meditation hall, Upper Hamlet, March 19, 2006

Monks and nuns chanting, New Hamlet, March 23, 2006

Thay during walking meditation, New Hamlet, March 23, 2006